Episode Transcript
<p><!--block-->Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of Kupo Nukes. As always, I'm your host, Mr. Whiskey. But not as always, yes indeed, we have an in-person international interview. Super excited about this. Like I've mentioned in past episodes, they're not easy to find here in Japan. Everyone's busy, overworked, tired. It's too hot outside, which is fair. It is very hot outside. But, we've got the air conditioning on in here, and, we, you know, we, us men, we had our own parasols, you know, behind our shoulders keeping us cool. So, we're here with Mr. John Daly. I met him at a Gaijin festival. It was a, it was a certain time, one of my least favorite experiences, but I got to meet some cool people, him included. So finally, we're catching up. A man who is presiding in a part of Japan that shares a name with one of the most famous anime protagonists, that is Saitama from One Punch Man, and he's gonna tell you all about how exciting it is to live there and how awesome Japan is, and of course, why he's here. So Mr. Daly, so great to have you here. Thank you, sir. Thanks for having me. It's, good to see you again. Oh, yeah. And, I'm curious though, you, you didn't have a good time at that Gaijin-Pa event? Here is the deal. I've been to a lot of events. Mm-hmm. I've spoken at events. I've performed comedy at events. For me, there was a couple flaws. Number one, the sponsors were not respected. They did not quiet down the crowd. The sponsors spoke, I think without a microphone, and if they had one, it was not effective, over groups of people congregating. Sponsors who were looking for donations for charitable causes, sponsors who had spent their money to make that event for us, and no one respected them. And that is not just on the crowd. Obviously, that was us individually, but the event organizers really needed to do a part to respect those sponsors who spent their time and money to set up tables to speak, and that really broke my heart as someone who's, looked into sponsoring events or has interacted with sponsors. You know, it's not free to be there. Sure. A lot of them spend- Right ... sometimes several thousand dollars, sometimes hundreds of dollars. The one ... Some of them were looking for, I believe, was donations to help rebuild an area that had been destroyed, so they weren't respected. The food was good. The food was good. The Wagyu steak was good. I will say, I didn't eat all day. Yeah. It was good. I found it to be everyone had the same job. It was not really a networking event. My personal experience, it w- I just got hit on by drunk women who were like, "Oh, you're a foreigner. That's so cool. You know, we love foreign men." I got maybe one or two business connections. Everyone else either just wanted to sleep with me or was a guy who said, "Hey, I wanted to sleep with that woman. I'm not gonna do business with you now." And I also had a, a drunk guy following me around who people didn't wanna talk to me because of him saying, "Oh, you Americans are all the same." And I was like, "He's Canadian. He's not even American." So yeah, I just found it to be a certain crowd. The music performance was good, but it was also, like, a minute, you know? Yeah, for sure. And that's an exaggeration, but it was very short. And they drew the raffles at the very beginning of the event, which I felt was not proper. Not everyone got a chance to put their card in. I see. Okay. I was the first person there. I got there maybe 15, 20 minutes early. There was no line even, and they didn't even show me the box to put my card in, so I didn't even have a chance to be in a raffle. Ah. And then they were calling the raffle numbers. They did not quiet down the room for that either. You know, people were confused. And yeah, it was just, for me, not a good time comparatively to... I've been to a lot of conferences, a lot of events that have done significantly better, 10 times the amount of network connections, more time, more space. Mm-hmm. That venue was not the right size at all. It was tiny. It was- It was not the right size. But really that- How they treated responsive, and the guy who made this event, and then I guess he sold it off later, he came up to me, went to talk to me, and then completely zoned out and ignored my answer to his question that he asked me, and he was like, "I gotta go," and walked away. So yeah, I personally felt like comparatively it was not good. I had high hopes for it. Spent a pretty good amount of money on the ticket 'cause I found it, like, a few days beforehand. Sure. So y- I did not get that early bird sale. Ah, gotcha. And yeah, and they kind of, they were picky and choosy about whose stuff they reposted on social media, which mine was not included in that. Oh, okay. And- I don't even think I followed them- Yeah ... on social media. Yeah. I only followed it for the event. They never posted any of the pictures really. They had a professional photographer there, but she didn't do photos, I believe. I asked her and she said she only did, like, a videography thing. Ah. And mind you, everyone I emailed from that event, just did not follow me or respond or read my message and left it unread. Maybe that's a reflection of me, but, um, I reached out, I said, "I'd like to make social media content for your business, do an interview, or see other ways I can help you out." Nothing. Yeah. Comparative to American conferences, the response rate is way higher. So I don't know if it's a cultural thing. I don't know if Japanese companies don't like the term couple of nukes. I think that might have a huge thing to do with it. It might. It might. But, uh, yeah. Little- I actually did- ... effect in there. Yeah. I, I did stand-up comedy once about, I got to the airport for work in Japan and, they were like, "What are you here to do?" And I said, "Well, a couple of nukes." And, I got detained, and yeah. I did stand-up comedy about that once. Gotcha. It, it does, uh, cause some confusion. I can understand that. Yeah, yeah. But what about you? I mean, if you had a good time or- Oh, yeah. I actually found the outside seating before most other people did, and I also found- See, that was a nice space ... it was fantastic. And I found a almost, unnoticed table of food. So- Oh, okay. Yeah ... I was eating and going back constantly, and I just stuffed myself for, like, the first half of the event. Right. And just sat there and played mobile games on my phone while everybody else got ripped and fought over the food on the inside. But that right there, see- You enjoyed the time, but I went there for business connections. True, true, true. Right? So playing mobile games and eating food- Yeah ... I mean, I could do that pretty much anywhere. True. That's true. So for me, my, my incentive and goal was a little different. Right, right. I was away from my children. Right. I, I got to eat steak. Yeah. So, so you had a good time. That's right. That's right. Yeah. But did you make... Well, I guess you weren't even looking for business connections. I mean, I was, but- Or, like, in what sense? To get more work or just to meet bilingual people? Yeah, just to network, meet people at different- Yeah organizations and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, I think the only person, I actually met one guy who I'm connected with on LinkedIn. It was my first- Hm ... time to meet him. He owns a pharmaceutical brand- Okay ... that he started here in Japan. So that's cool. So that was really cool to meet him. I met another guy who's a, I think he's a mechanical engineer, and he's from France. Nice guy, and I talk to him a little bit socially now, so that's cool. And of course, you know, I met you. So I mean, you know, meeting, uh, two or three people that, you know- Yeah ... I see again and talk to, it, that's a decent conversion rate- Yeah ... in, in the modern age. I got invited out, but the individuals who invited me out, it was not- It was not the type of connection I was looking for It wasn't what you were going for. Yes. Gotcha. Yes, yes. I mean, if I wasn't engaged, then maybe- ... it could've been a, a, the best event of my life. But, um- Gotcha ... no, unfortunately, I, I went there. And it's something I've experienced before, where a lot of women who are business connections are interested in working with me, and then when they find out through social media later on that I'm engaged, say, "Oh, actually I changed my mind," blah, blah, blah. I've seen a switch up, which it just sucks, you know? 'Cause I want people to like the business and the mission, not me. Mm-hmm. It shouldn't matter whether, oh, he's a handsome single bachelor or he's taken. Because it's about the suicide prevention, the addiction recovery, the prevention awareness of domestic violence, sexual violence, human trafficking. It shouldn't just be like, "I like Mr. Whiskey, therefore I'm willing to make content with him because maybe it'll bring us closer." Gotcha. You know? But that's- Okay ... the unfortunate part is sometimes people, like I act- this has happened to me, where women are like, "Yes, yes, yes." And then they're like, "Oh, you're engaged. No, no, no." And if you were only doing it for business reasons, why would it matter if I'm engaged? Right. ' Cause they work with plenty of older men who are engaged, or men they don't find attractive, or women who are married, right? So there's ulterior motives everywhere you go, you know? So that was the event for me. Probably wouldn't go again. I'll just save the 8,000, 10,000 yen and go get, the same price, you know, two hours all- Yeah ... make your own- Exactly. Exactly ... melt, get the melted cheesy bowl and stuff. There you go. So yeah. Fair enough. But you, sir- Sorry, sorry ... how did you end up in Japan- Yeah of all places? It's been kind of a back and forth. I graduated in the winter of 2011 in the United States. And, you may recall, that was a time of government fund freezing and no money. And- That's like every year now Right, yes. It was really bad then to where- Right. Yeah ... there wa- there were no federal jobs, no state jobs. Couldn't get a job as dog catcher, and I wanted to do federal law enforcement, was, you know- Oh, yeah ... I studied criminal justice. I wanted to get into that. Thought you were gonna say you wanted to do dog catching. No, no. I mean, that's- You said, "No dog catching." That's- Then you said, "I really wanted..." I said, "Oh, okay." That was, that was my backup. Yeah, yeah. My backup. Yeah. You know, I couldn't even do my backup. So I didn't know what I was gonna do, and I had taken Japanese and studied in Japan, and I was like, "Well, I can-" In college? Yes. You took Japanese? Mm-hmm. Yep. As part of your major or like an elective? So it became a major. At my school you had to take four semesters of foreign language. Oh, wow. Okay. And yeah, so that was annoying. But I ended up studying in Japan, and then they were like, "Hey, if you stay one more semester you can get a major in this." And I said, "Okay, why not?" You graduated in America? Mm-hmm. But you went to school in Japan? I did one year abroad. Okay. Yeah. Which year was that, by the way? Senior year or your junior, sophomore? Kinda difficult. So backing up even further, I actually had a Navy scholarship, like an ROTC scholarship. Oh, nice. And they yanked it from me like three weeks before I was supposed to start at an out-of-state big school- Mm Due to me getting allergy shots that I disclosed, you know, over a year ago when I started the application- Mm ... process and at every medical checkup and- Right, right ... you know, everything. So, yeah, I went to community college for a year, and it was kind of a bummer because I was registering like three weeks before courses started- Right so all the good stuff's gone, right? Everything's full. Yeah. So I just, my folks thought if I didn't have some sort of structure I'd, you know, run off the rails, which they- Mm ... maybe. But I mean, I took a whole hodgepodge of whatever was open, and so it was kind of like my junior year, but I had already had like one year that was just kind of a throwaway at- Interesting community college. Yeah. So with the whole Navy thing- Mm-hmm ... obviously you mentioned you disclosed them ahead of time and stuff. Mm-hmm. And then they were suddenly saying, "Oh, wow, look at this. You, you can't have these." Yeah. Like, you can't be sent overseas because of them, or- I- ... you're non-deployable kind of thing I had no idea. I got a letter in the mail from Pensacola, and it was, it wasn't like a packet or anything. Good old Pensacola. Yeah, just a letter envelope. Right. And just, "Sorry, bro, you're out of luck, uh, A- Admiral Butthole." Right. So- Sounds about right. Yep. So, you know, I, I called Admiral Butthole- Right ... and said, "What gives?" And he gave me some platitudes, and then my mother snatched the phone away- Mm ... and chewed out Admiral Butthole. And, uh- Right. Well, they just wasted this whole year of your life- Right, and, and, and more ... you preparing for this. Right? I mean- And it's not like this, as you mentioned, if you disclose it a year in advance, it's like, well, why did- Exactly wait. And they might say, "Well, you know what? Someone didn't catch it until the- Sure ... final check through and stuff. And it's like, okay, so where's the responsibility and accountability for every chain of command that reviewed this for the past year? Right. Which was more than one. Right. Of course. Had you done, like, MEPS and stuff, or- No I don't know how that works if you're doing college side. No, no, no, no, I did go to two different medical checkups. Okay. Had to do the old bend over and spread 'em and everything. Right. Right. That was exciting. Mine was more exciting, I can guarantee you. Oh, okay. But, yeah, that was a big moment. Not in a weird way. Wait, I gotta clarify that. Okay. So I was at MEPS, and you know, they, they do the, they check you down there. Mm-hmm. And, I remember the guy was like, "Turn around," or whatever. Well, so here's the deal. We were in line. Mm-hmm. And they were going every other one with two doctors. I see. And one of them was this older Jewish guy, and he had really big knuckles, and the other was a young Asian man with very smooth, small fingers. So we were joking, you know, you, you want one, not the other if they're gonna, you know, put the fingers in. Yes. Which they don't, by the way. Yeah. They're not actually gonna- They're just looking for hemorrhoids ... do the prostate. Right. But we all thought it was a prostate exam, you know? We thought they were doing... And I didn't know, because I didn't know, you know? Sure. So people were telling me it's a prostate exam, you know, they're gonna put their fingers in there. So the doctor told me, like, "Turn around," or whatever, and- Whatever ... and then I just stood there. And then he was just like, "What are you waiting for?" And I was like, "For you to spread me." And he was like, "What? No, you do that yourself. I don't do that." Most, one of the most awkward moments in my life because I said, "Okay, well it was my understanding that I was going in here. You, you know, you put the gloves on and then that you were gonna look around." And he goes, "No, you hold it open and then I'll look around." Yeah. That's, this was such a weird conversation to have, you know? It's like living in the Fist of Fury. I know. And I, well, and he, I got the big knuckle guy too. Yeah. So I was extra nervous. He, it was closed. It was... You could not see anything, you know? It was iron shut, you know, I was nervous. And it was so awkward to have to tell another man, like, "I'm waiting for you to spread me," you know? Oh, well mine was- Med- medically. My, my, my- And he was just, he was so caught off guard. He was kind of appalled. I can see that. Like, why are you disgusted? Like, your job is looking at... you probably, this is probably the 100th one you've seen today. It, at least. And hopefully it was the best looking one. Yeah. I mean, there you go. I doubt it, but I saw some of the other people, you know, not there, but I saw them and I said, "I, sure I'd look better down there than them," but... See, I had , the gorgeous modelesque, Black woman doctor. Oh. Yeah. So that was, that was exciting. So you did enjoy hers? Uh, also awkward though, because she's like- Did you tell her she had to spread you? No, I should've. Oh. I should've. But, she was very clear and she's like, "Okay, I need you to pull your pants down- Right ... turn around, bend over and spread your cheeks." Mm-hmm. And I was like, "Excuse me?" ... You know, normally I make people pay for that. But, um, she's like, "We're checking you for hemorrhoids." And I was like, "Oh, okay." Oh. Makes sense then. Right. So, but anyway... 'Cause I always lie about my hemorrhoids when I go into an organization. Gotcha. Yeah. Yeah. They, they don't like you having those, you know. Yeah. No, no. They're itching or burning. Right, exactly. Can be a distraction. Exactly, yep. And then, you know, you spread them to other- Yeah ... other things. But they're not as bad as apparently w- allergy shots. What do you mean, like? Oh, I was getting weekly allergy shots. Because my allergies were so bad, and then I went to- Like tree pollen kind of stuff, or? Everything. Oh. Everything. Since I was in, like, second or third grade. It was crazy. Okay. I guess the fear is you're non-deployable in the sense that if you need any medicine routinely- Right. Mm-hmm ... what are they gonna do, send you on an aircraft carrier- Right ... with like 500 allergy shots? Exactly. So I understand that point. I get it, but- Yeah ... like I said, I- They knew about it ... been very open about the situation, yeah. But, so anyway, I quit doing them. I was just like, you know, "If I die, I die. Whatever. I don't wanna take these anymore." And I was fine, which is insane that I'd been on these shots- Right you know, two shots a week for 10 years. But it was too late at that point to- Right, 'cause you have to be off it for a year or whatever, and you know, Lieutenant Butthole called me back the next semester and was like, "Hey, we can get this back for you." And I was just like, "Pfft," 'cause I didn't wanna- Right do that anymore. Why work for an organization that already screwed me over? Right. Exactly. Wait till I'm in. Right. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. You know, you expect them to, to- Right ... bruise you when you're in the Navy, not before you even get in, so. Right. I thought you wanted me. I thought you had a bonus if you got me. Ex- exactly. But, um- Yeah ... so that didn't work out, and I did the Japan thing, and I ended up teaching in Japan for a couple of years, After you graduated ... after I graduated. So 2011, economic crisis. Sure. So you say to yourself, "I'm gonna move to Japan." Yes. So 2012, moved to Japan. Their government's open. Yeah. Well, and I was working for a dispatch company where they hire teachers, and then they send you to various schools in Japan. Mm-hmm. So I was in the middle of nowhere- Right ... in Ibaraki. This is, you know, 2012, so the iPhone's new. Mm-hmm. And they give you a Mac Oh, the fake, the paper map a paper map Right With little- In kanji. Yeah, it's in, yeah, all in Japanese with little stars where your schools are, and you have to... A- and a little circle around where your apartment is, and you had to find them. And so I'm driving around Japan in a little kei car and- Right ... finding my schools, and eventually, about a month and a half in, the sixth grade classroom had, like, full-on riot. They ripped the kids' stuff up, threw it out the third story window. That you were teaching. I had shown up to start teaching and was waiting my turn- Mm ... and that's when it kicked off. And I mean, kids were fighting, slapping at each other, you know, throwing scissors and compasses- Really? ... you know, the, this kind of compass with the point on it. But the Japanese are so polite and well-behaved. Yeah, no. That, that's- Right ... more fake news. Right. Um, there's, you know, they're, they're humans too, and- Just like any kids in any school. Yes. You know. And, it was really crazy. Teachers were ripping kids apart. Not, not, like, ripping kids apart- Yeah, yeah ... like, you know, a vampire, but, like, pulling kids off of each other and yeah, it was- Oh, wow it was- Like, actually had to physically intervene. Yeah, absolutely. Like, kids were getting beat up and, you know- Geez ... it was, it was insane. And, um- I get it. I mean, they were so upset about the American economy collapsing that they must've just- Yeah ... they were worried about their futures. Yeah, no more... You know, they weren't sure if that next season of Bugs Bunny was getting translated. But, um- ... they, uh, the school people and the dispatch company that I worked for came to me, and they were like- Right ... "The board of education is gonna come and ask you about this. We need you to say that you didn't see what happened." And I was like, "Oh, you want me to lie to government officials? Yeah, that's gonna happen." Like, my first day at the job. Right. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's, that's not gonna happen. And you know, at this school too, they had kids throwing rocks at the windows and- Wow ... you know, keying teachers' cars and stuff. What? It was just insane. Insane. In sixth grade? Yeah. No, this wasn't just the sixth graders that were doing that. These kids were wild. Mm. So I quit that, a few months in, and then I started working at an English conversation school. That's where I met my wife. She was working there as, like, a receptionist, basically. Right. And we ended up getting engaged and all that. You said, "Mark in the calendar this appointment, you and me next Sunday." Yeah. So that worked out. And, you know, did some other jobs, ended up going back to school, start, got into IT, and, I was working at, a big energy company in the US. Mm. And my coworker buddy was sitting next to me, and he was like, "Hey, John, I found this job at Microsoft that you need to know networking and security and speak Japanese. You do those things." And I was like, "Oh, yeah, Microsoft, right," 'cause I've been- Uh-huh ... out of school for, like, you know, my technical school, you know? Right, right. Two year, two year degree in, in IT. Microsoft's gonna hire me with no experience and my elementary school level Japanese, right? Sure enough, they did, and I worked there for five and a half years- Wow talking to people on the phone in Japanese and, big company, big important stuff like the government's coronavirus website went down, and- Oh, wow ... it was on our infrastructure, and we had to help fix it. You know, 7-Eleven a bunch of their stuff was in Azure. Yamato Transport, like any time they beep a package, that was in the cloud. Mm-hmm. That was us, so. So all these companies were connected to Microsoft- Yes ... through their- They were using their cloud computing ... digital software. Okay. And I was supporting that, so when stuff would break, it's like- Right ... you know, I'm, I'm fixing something big, and I have- Yeah ... heavy hitters on the phone- Mm that are spending millions of dollars to do this stuff, so- Right, and they want it back now. They do. They want it back yesterday. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'd been speaking Japanese and got approached on LinkedIn by a manager at the company I work at now, and he was like, "Hey, would you be interested in this job? You know, we pay to move your family to Japan." And I was like, "Well, my, my kids are at this time, uh, three and, or three-" Wait, so you, you went back to America- Yeah ... for the Microsoft job? Yes, so I was doing- But you were working with companies in Japan. Yeah, so I was doing night support, so of course the East Coast- Oh, okay time difference is almost perfect. Right, 'cause it was daytime here and nighttime there. Vice versa, 'cause we're here. Oh, okay. So Boy, so you- Daytime in America, nighttime in Japan. Oh, you were, you were overnight IT basically for Japan. For Japan, yeah. Which was your daytime. Which was my daytime. It's perfect, yes. Exactly, exactly. So you brought your wife back with you to America then? Yeah. Um, she was small. Oh. She fit in a carryon. No. We, um, we were separated for a while. We had to do a long distance thing. She took- Yeah ... a contract job, and she didn't wanna leave early. It was- I was gonna say- Yeah ... it's a lot of contracts here in Japan. And it was awful, and you know, I was, I was like- No, I can bet ... with her, and I was like, "Look, you know, this isn't gonna work. If you wanna stay at this job, I'm leaving." Like- And you were already married. Yes, and- So how soon did you get married after you met her? Few years. We were- Oh, okay. Yeah. We dated for a year and change- maybe two years, and then got engaged and we got married in 2015, early 2015. So I mean, it was like three years from meeting to getting married. How soon after marriage did you have to go to the US? So we got engaged when she came to visit me. In the US. In the US. Also, were y'all talking online during that three-year period? Yes. So there was, there was some separation. Like, we dated, from 2012 to 2014, then I moved back to the US. Here in the US. Yes, 'cause my visa was done and I didn't- Oh, okay ... wanna work at that conversation school anymore. Right, right, right. I didn't wanna teach English anymore, and I moved back, and we just kinda left it open. She came and visited me, like, a few months later. Oh, wow. And I was like, "Yeah, I wanna marry her." Yeah. And so we got engaged, and then like six months later I went and visited her, and we got married at City Hall in Japan. Oh, okay. And then, like four or five months later, I moved back to Japan. Mm. And then we were here for nine months. Mm. And that was when she had the horrible job, and I got a job close to my family in Charlotte, and I moved back, and then she came like five months later. So it's been a lot of back and forth- Oh, yeah. Absolutely ... like you said. It's been a lot then. And- I'm still laughing about they gave you a map and it was like, it looks like an anime. That time I got reincarnated as a school teacher in Japan, and I had to hunt down and track all the schools I'm teaching at. Oh, yeah. You know? It's like- And they were spread out in the middle- Yeah ... of nowhere. So it was ... I accidentally made a wrong turn, and I was driving through this, like, elevated road through a rice field. Right. And at the end of it was the entrance to the freeway, and I was like- Yeah, sounds about right ... "That's not where I wanna go." Yeah. And I had to do a three-point turn, and my rear wheels fell off the road. And I pulled them back up with the front-wheel drive car. So it was good. People don't realize, 'cause all the tourists, you know, they look on social media, it's always Tokyo, Kyoto, Osaka. Mm-hmm. I took a train all the way out to Hikone, Kobe, Awaji Island. Mm-hmm. You could be in the middle of nowhere. Oh, yeah. Like, there is a lot of farmland. Yeah. There's a lot of rural areas that I was like, man, if I got stranded here ... And it looks small, 'cause, you know, you're like, oh, it only took me two hours on a train to cross half the country. And I looked to walk, was like 19 days, you know? Yeah. Like, you could be lost for sure. Well- And wh- where... When you first came to Japan- Mm-hmm ... for the abroad school study- Mm-hmm ... what part of Japan were you in? I was in Tokyo. So that was in Tokyo. Mm-hmm. But when you came back to teach, it was what, like- It's in- When you say middle of nowhere, like west Japan, northeast? I don't know. It was in Kanto, but it was in Ibaraki. Okay. So middle of nowhere, but- Never even heard of it, so. Well, yeah, it's, like, a couple of prefectures up. Okay. So- Of To- of Tokyo, like northwest? Northeast. Northeast. Okay. So going out towards, like- So yeah, like Tokyo's here. Chiba's here. Saitama's here. Mm-hmm. Ibaraki's here. Oh, okay. That's where- Up over Chiba. Yeah, I know what you're talking about, so. Oh, kind of middle-ish of the country. Yeah, I mean, I, it's- Yeah ... I mean, I, I, you can get from Akihabara, Tokyo to Tsukuba, Ibaraki in 45 minutes on an express train. Oh, yeah. So it's- That's not bad at all ... not that far at all. Sorry, I thought you were, like- No, it's fine ... in the middle of this field. Well, and- You made it sound like it was so abandoned ... well, and, and it was. It is. Yeah. If you, if you think about it, it's something like, I don't have the exact numbers, 90% of the country's population lives- Right in, like, five cities here. Yeah. So, like- Yeah ... I mean, once you go outside of Tokyo and the suburbs- It gets sparse fast ... yeah, it does Or even right here in, in Yokosuka, like, as soon as you're away from Yokosuka Chūō, like, it's all residential. Mm-hmm. And it gets smaller and smaller and more spread out. I mean, driving here Yeah ... to come here, I was driving through the woods. Yeah. Yeah. And I was surrounded by trees. Yeah. And I was like, "Oh, wow, you don't see this very often." Very mountainous over- Yeah ... this area. So. There's actually a mountain right over here. You can overlook the whole city- Nice ... and the ocean and the islands. It's pretty nice. That's cool. You can look across and see Tokyo Bay. Oh, nice. Sometimes I catch the silhouette of Godzilla quickly before it disappears. Before he goes back under? But, yeah, well, actually, his first footstep is, down, down the street here. Okay. It's about, one hour if you run the 5K pace I run, you know, which not everyone does, but if you run down this way about an hour, they have his footprint because he was first sighted over here. Okay. Uh, there's actually a statue of him over here. When you're coming around the mountains and the trees, you suddenly see his head emerges, 'cause Yokosuka over this area is where he first appeared in 1954- I see ... before going to other places. Oh. So they have all kinds of dedications to him here, the footprint, the Godzilla slide. Me and my friend got stuck in it because it's for kids, and our shoulders got stuck. I, how could I not do the Godzilla slide? That's fair. That's fair. And I, in my defense, I thought I was gonna be, like, 100 feet tall, and then it was, like, maybe 20 feet tall, and we went to go in it and our shoulders were stuck. I'm like, "Come on. Come on. We gotta do it." It was like, it's not doing justice. But, you know- Yeah ... Godzilla in 1954 was smaller than- That's true. Yeah, that's right ... he's gotten bigger and bigger and bigger- Right. That's right. That's right ... over time. And to all the Japanese kids, I mean, it's pro- you know, it towers over you. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. When you're little, yeah. But I'm not a two-year-old Japanese boy. That's true. On the inside I am. Sometimes. Fair. Fair. Sometimes I feel like one on the inside. But yeah, so you came back and forth, which just to unpack a little bit about mental health and relationships. Mm-hmm. That's a huge strain. Oh, yeah. I've done distance before. I hate it. It's not natural. It's hard. You know, God didn't say, "Adam and Eve, you two go in these two different gardens, write letters each day." He said, "Right here." Yeah. "Right next to each other." You know? It's unnatural. Yeah. So were there any lessons that you feel like were really valuable or just breaking points that you wish people could avoid? Or sometimes it's hard. Sometimes jobs do call you apart. Yeah, yeah. And I mean, I think as long as you're committed to the person and to the relationship- Yeah ... and you know that, you know, the future's worth the struggle, then it's, it's not that bad. Yeah. I mean, now that you look back on it, right, you kinda have the rose-colored glasses on, and- Right it doesn't, you don't remember how much of a bummer it was. Well- Felt like a few days- Right, exactly ... after, after. Yeah But, you know, while you're in the thick of it, it was probably a lot worse. But, you know, the human brain likes to- Mm ... cover that up as best it can, so. What about, so an important part of that is communication. Mm-hmm. Now, you had a bit of a cross-cultural, cross-language communication barrier, to some degree. Mm-hmm. It sounds like, did she speak English it sounds like? Decently. Yeah. So did that play any role with, in maybe increased misunderstandings or culturally was she a bit Americanized or was she very traditional Japanese and did that play any roles, especially with her family? Sure. So I was actually inter- it's, it, I was kind of, I don't know, worried, but, apprehensive about meeting her family. Yeah. But, her mom absolutely loves me. I get along fine with her dad. Oh, okay ... yeah, when my parents came and visited they got along fine with him. But, yeah, we've definitely had language-based misunderstandings. Humor in Japan, in The US is very different. Oh, yeah. They don't like sarcasm. They don't like- We're gonna find out tonight. Yeah. They don't like dark jokes. You know, I'll- Mm I'll tell my wife, like, yeah, you might be in trouble. Yeah. I've got my comedy show tonight, but. Yeah, comedy show, you're probably okay. Yeah, it's a little different. But, you know, I'll make a joke about something and my wife's, "I'm having a serious conversation with you." And I'm like, "Sorry. Uh, my bad." Right, right. So even now, you know, we've been together since 2013, and I'm still stepping in it, you know- Mm ... 13 years later. So it's like, what are you gonna do? I mean, that's marriage, right? You know, e- especially when you have, you know, different cultures and everything. But, you know, we have two kids and, we're pretty aligned on values and what we want our children to learn and who we want them to be. Right. And, you know, there's always gonna be a little bit of cultural drift and, disagreement about- Mm ... how to raise the children and how to react- Yeah ... to certain things and all of that, especially since, I would say Japanese mothers tend to be, I don't wanna say more enabling. There's a good word I'm looking for, but I can't- Oh, I was gonna say the opposite. I assumed it might be a bit harsher. Oh. Or you think they're softer parenting? They're, they're very soft with little kids at least. They let them get away with everything. Mm. Um, not, not, you know- Right ... it's a generalization, right? Right. And everybody's different to an extent, but, I see mothers who let their kids hit them and- Wow yeah, go crazy and scream and fuss and- Yeah ... they put up with a lot of nonsense from their kids. Well,- I can give an analogy. My mom was a dog breeder and trainer. Mm-hmm. And a lot of people, if they have a small dog, they let it do whatever it wants, 'cause it's like, who cares? It's a small dog. Mm-hmm. But when they have a big attack dog or working dog, it's like, hey, you make sure that you're the alpha, that you're leading. Never let them walk in front of you. Mm-hmm. But a lot of people would say, "Well, my small dog, they can walk wherever they want." Yeah. You know, I'll just pull them back 'cause they're small. But it's about the mentality of it. Right. It's not like, hey, just 'cause they're small, it, it doesn't have consequences. Right. It's about the long-term impact- Mm-hmm ... of what they think they can and can't do. Right. I think if you let your children get away with everything when they're kids, you know, they're gonna treat you the same way when they're older. Exactly. And then you're gonna be like, "Well, you're older now. It's not okay." But it's always been okay, so why is it suddenly not okay? Right, and that's, that's hard to, you know, it's hard to break something- Yeah ... once it's ingrained like that. And are you- With your children, obviously they're biracial. Mm-hmm. Are you raising them bilingual as well? Trying to. They were doing mostly English in the US. Now, they go to a full Japanese school. Mm-hmm. They don't speak any English there. So they've been picking- Yeah ... it up very fast. But they're very young. They're like- Four and two. Yeah, so. So they're little sponges, so they'll be okay. Yeah. We speak English at home. It was kind of funny. My son was FaceTiming my mom the other day, and he just randomly started speaking Japanese to her. And I'm like, "Buddy, Grandma doesn't speak Japanese." Correct. Right. "You gotta, you gotta use English with Grandma." And he kinda had to, like, g- g- ch- Right. Right ... chick, chick, chick, chick. Oh. So. Yeah. But I think it's such a blessing to be born and raised bilingual- Mm-hmm ... rather than, you know, in our college age or later on in life- Right ... trying to learn another language, especially one where the alphabet's completely different. Mm-hmm. And I think, what about identity, though? So are they American, Japanese, Japanese American? Like, what are you and your wife planning? 'Cause do you intend to stay here? Is that the plan? We, we kinda don't know. With the way things are going with the government and the way that they're reacting to long-term foreign residents in Japan- Mm when, when we came over here, I'm on one of those newfangled highly skilled professional visas. Right. I could get a spouse visa, but- Mm ... the highly skilled professional allows you to file for permanent residency after one year. Mm. But they just put in new regulations- They're changing everything right, that makes it very hard to get permanent residency. Yeah. And more expensive and- And much more expensive ... everything. So- But there's a lot of crazy stuff going on in the US too. There is. So. But, I mean, it was like, I kinda got sold a false bill of goods- Mm ... because it was like, oh, I can come here, qualify for permanent residency. It'll be- Right ... a great deal. We can stay five years, kinda think about it. But, like, the, the time for Tokyo right now, luckily I don't live in Tokyo- Mm ... but permanent residency processing in Tokyo right now is about a year and a half from application. Mm. So it's kind of like the Japanese government said, "Hey, you can come over here with allergy shots," and they're like, "Whoa, you have allergy shots?" Yeah. "You can't be here." You know? Exactly. Exactly. This keeps happening to me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's, I'm noticing a trend. So we'll see. You know, the kids- Mm ... right now, they're kinda too young to- Right, to understand that ... you know, develop the identity- Yeah ... type thing. But, yeah, it'll definitely be a thing. And I don't know. I don't know what you do about that. Do they look more... Do they look foreign or white in a way- That's racist ... that you think No. Um, actually, an, a, a quick anecdote on that. People used to say, without thinking, they'd say, "Wow, your son looks just like you, but he has his mother's eyes." Mm-hmm. And I could drop the best, "That's racist." Right, right. You know, they'd realize what they said, and it was absolutely- Yeah ... hilarious. But, um- Well, I mean it in the sense that will they be bullied or, you know, outcast based off appearance? Because I've talked to some people here- Mm-hmm ... women and men who look white- Mm-hmm But they're biracial. Yeah. They speak fluent Japanese. They've lived there their whole life, and they get the treatment of, "Oh, you speak such good Japanese." Oh, yeah. Like, "Really? You're Japanese? No." And there's a lot of, it's a struggle for them to fit in. Yeah. You know, and they- It, and it will be, I think it was like a Netflix movie called Half, which is like it explores- Oh, okay that dynamic of being- Which I was saying, it's just- ... Japanese ... if you happen to look fully Japanese and speak and talk Japanese, and then mention that, oh, yeah, I'm part white, it's easier than if you look white- Right ... and are Japanese, if that makes sense. No, you're- Yeah ... you're, you're on point. My son has, incredibly curly light brown hair. And he looks just like me but has, like, Asian style eyes. Right. And so, like, if he puts on sunglasses, he looks just like me. Oh, okay. His skin is slightly, like, tinted, I'd say. Like, if I'm white- Mm ... he's tinted towards Asian. Right. But he's not, he doesn't have, like, a full Asian complexion and, like- Right Melanin situation in his skin. It's gonna be a cool situation- It'll be interesting to see ... if people don't believe he's Asian, and he just, like, takes off the glasses. Yeah. And they're like, "Oh." Yeah. "Oh." He wasn't You are. You're one of us. Yeah. And my- It's like Cyclops in X-Men. He's like, "Gotta take off the visor for full power." Yeah, exactly. My, my daughter, is very Japanese coded- Mm ... but she also has curly brown hair. Mm. So that'll be interesting to see. Surprised the curly brown hair took over so much. Yeah, that's, you normally- 'Cause I thought- You get a little bit of each part ... I assumed your wife has black hair? She does, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So usually that takes over. But she has curlier hair, too, so- Oh, okay ... I have curly hair, and she has cur- So, but yeah, they both got my hair. So that was interesting. But we'll see. We'll see what they look like. Yeah. You know, I mean, little kids and then their adult versions can look really different, so. But if they get your height, you know, they'll, they'll be- Well, I mean, I'm not that tall, but my, my dad is six foot and change. My brother's six foot and change. My sister's- Yeah ... six foot and change. A lot of times it- So ... it jumps a generation, too. Yeah. So hopefully they get some, some ups, you know. But we'll see. We'll see. But yeah, I mean, we, we know that it'll be a thing. A lot will depend on, you know, where we end up having them grow up and- What keeps you so anchored and calm am- among all this uncertainty? It feels like there's a lot of uncertainty- Yeah ... in your life to a degree. What keeps you so anchored and calm through all of it? I mean, you can't worry about things you can't control, right? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So I mean, I'll, I'll cro- drugs. That's the other way. No, I'm done. You know, no, it's I'm not at that bridge yet. Right. Why should I worry about crossing that bridge- Mm ... when I'm not even at it? I might be borrowing trouble. You know, just worry about that when it happens. Right. And, you know, try and prepare myself and my family as best we can, and we'll work it out. So my wife and I went through a lot together- We're still here, we're still together, and- Yeah ... hopefully that'll stay true with the family, you know? Just- Okay. Yeah. Okay. So that being said, let's take a little bit of a look at what have you really enjoyed about living in Japan, and then we'll get into what you don't enjoy. Sure. Well, let- let's do not enjoy first- Okay ... and then end on a more positive note. Okay, that's fair. I think that would be better. That's fair. Yeah. Um, it's really- Like, I hate it here, actually ... it's, it's really hot here in the summer- Yeah ... as you're experiencing. Yeah. Uh- And now I realize that. Like I said, I came here in the March two years in a row, and it was actually cold. I didn't realize how cold it got. Mm-hmm. Then, this year I was here and it was cold, then it just rained every day- Yeah for, like, a month straight. Yep. And then it was just sweltering hot. Right. There was, like, no spring. Yes. Like, does Japan not have a spring? That's right. It- it was, like, a week long. That's the right. There was, like, one week- Yeah ... where I was in, you know, short sleeves, pants. I was walking around. I'm like, "It's so beautiful out," and then it was just raining every day. You better be careful. And then the mosquitoes got so bad. You better be careful. Japan loves their four seasons. That's, like, one of their cliches that they will tell you is that Japan has four seasons. But yeah. Yeah. So. They're not the same four seasons that I'm used to, then. The heat is bad, and especially for folks who have never lived here. When you're in the US, you get- go out of your house- Mm ... and it's air-conditioned with central air, and you get in- Yeah ... your car and you turn the air conditioner on. Right. And you drive to wherever you're going, and you get out and walk 30 seconds into the building. Yeah. And you go from air conditioning to air conditioner to air conditioner. Mm. Right? A lot of walking here- Right, exactly ... in the sun. You're walking in the sun. It's very humid. It's- Mm-hmm ... you know, it's 100 degrees outside almost every day. And- And, and the train stations are open- They're ... 'cause the train comes in and out. Mm-hmm. So you'll be begging for a train to come by to get the breeze. Right. That's how I cool down in the station. Yeah. The train comes by. Exactly. But it's, it's humid in there. Yeah. It's hot in there. It's- A bunch of people breathing on you. It's sweaty and- Yeah ... so yeah, it's a bummer. Luckily, my office has showers, so I actually shower after I get to work because- Oh, that's so awful. Yeah. That's so awful that you gotta- It is so disgusting- Right, right ... by the time I get there. So that's tough. Government is highly involved in a lot more things here than in the US. Mm. For example, daycare. Really? ... almost all the daycares are, like, state run, state federally run, right? Mm, mm. At the, at the level of the city, right? Yeah, yeah. 'Cause Japan has one big government, right? Yeah. It's not like the US where we have separate states that roll up- Right ... to the feds. You know, the Japanese have everything's the same in every prefecture to a large, large extent. And then, you know, it's administered at different levels, but the city, has all the control of who gets- Mm to go to what daycare, and it's based on points. Like social credit kinda thing? Or what do you mean points? Yes and no. So, like, if you're a single parent- Mm-hmm ... you get, like, 90 points automatically. Mm. If you're a married couple with one spouse not working, you get five points. Oh, basically It's saying, like, what's the reality of how much do you really need this? Right. Or, like, who needs it more? Right. The problem though is it's subsidized by taxes, so the government choosing who needs stuff more when everybody's paying for it is problematic in my worldview. Right. So you and your wife technically, if you're both working, pay more for the daycare- Mm-hmm than the single parent who's not. Right. And is it kind of a situation where the single parent is getting a nicer daycare than you? No, not necessarily. Oh, okay, okay. But- I was gonna say then that would be really messed up. Right. But it's just, again in my opinion- Mm-hmm ... the government deciding who gets what with everybody's money is not the way it should be done. Right. And so I was very surprised to hear that was the situation, and my wife stressed out about it really hard. Mm. And luckily our kids got to go to the same school and it worked out. It's not too far from our house, but I mean- you can get told, "No, your kids can't go to daycare. There's no daycare for your kids." Under the incentive that like, "Hey, there are so many people who need it more than you- Right ... and we only have room for X, Y, Z spots." Right. Exactly. Wow. Yeah, I mean, that is a situation of, like, who gets to determine that? Right. But I also understand- Mm-hmm ... if you have a spouse who's home not working- Mm-hmm why can't they watch the kid? Sure. I can understand that- Right ... if a single parent is working and they have no one to watch. Mm-hmm. But again, like- Well- ... why should the government be in charge of my personal family matters? Right. And why- You know, there could be other incentives for me sending the kid to daycare. Why- Maybe it's to socialize- Right ... or maybe it's whatever. There you go. And why am I subsidizing someone else's poor life decisions? Right. Um, basically you're paying for it. Like, I'm, I'm not trying to hate on anybody. Like, there's- Yeah, stuff happens. Stuff happens. Yeah. Exactly. But I mean, generally if you wind up a single parent, you didn't do everything right, right? Mm. You married the wrong person. You- Mm ... you made some bad decisions. I mean- Right ... yes, it happens. You know, your spouse gets hit and killed by a bus or something, right? Yeah. You know, that's tragic. You should go to the top of the line. But, you know, you had a no-fault divorce with your spouse, or you married some scumbag who beat you and ran off, you know. Mm-hmm. Why do I have to pay for that? And I know that sounds callous, but I have a decent salary. I pay a lot of money in taxes, and I get- Right ... told that I have to pay for somebody else's kid to go to daycare and my kids can't go? Right, 'cause it's not just about the you're paying for it, but you're suffering the consequences possibly of your kids not going to daycare- Right. Exactly ... because of their choices. Mm-hmm. So yeah, that's weird that the government is involved with that. Mm-hmm. Um- And there's, there's other things- And there's- ... like that as well here. Yeah. So. And then it's like, typically daycares are private institutions in the US- Mm-hmm ... I assume, so. Yeah. But you can't have that here, I guess, so- They, we have them they do. But they're expensive. Mm. So that's the other thing. We pay for daycare. But then you're paying twice 'cause you're paying- Yeah ... for the public daycares- Exactly ... and then you're paying for the private daycare. Yeah. Your, your taxes subsidize it, and then- Mm-hmm ... we also have to pay for daycare, but it's based on our income. So we pay more for daycare than people who make less money than us. Like, they have more subsidy- Wow ... coming in from the government. Yeah. Right? Yeah. So. That, that's crazy. It i- and I mean, I know that's, like, a thing that we just say, like, that's crazy, just- Yeah ... to me. Like, you know, that's different than what I'm used to. Yeah. So I mean, I know you're not saying it's insane. Yeah. But, just for, for the viewers out there, no one thinks that they're insane here or anything. It's just different, right? And , it's difficult for us to wrap our brains around as Westerners. And there's moral conflictions involved with it and money conflictions. Mm-hmm. And I don't know, it sounds like a bit of an overstep, you know? Yeah. Well, and you have to remember, too, Japan is extremely ethnically and socially homogenous and, you know- Right ... no conflict, help the society out as a whole. Right. And that's how they do it here. You know, I can, I can whine about it and not like it- Right, right ... but, I mean, I chose to come here. I gotta play by their rules- Yeah, yeah, yeah ... in their sandbox, and I'm not trying to be a crybaby about it. It's just that was something that shocked me and, you know, generally I don't like when the government's telling me what happens with my money and they give it to other people, right? So that was- Yeah ... that was just something that, that stood out- Yeah ... to me that I- Well- ... didn't like ... and it's a problem in the US too. There's a lot of people on welfare or other government aid that don't need it or that misspend it. Right. You know, my- They take advantage of it. Yeah. You know, my dad was a police officer for 25 years, and he said it's interesting because he would go to all these homes, on different criminal calls that were homes that were on welfare or food stamps, and they would complain, "We don't have any food or money." And they would- he said every single time they said that, they had stacks and stacks of cases of soda. They had all this junk food. They're saying, "Our kids are, are malnourished. They have no food to eat." And, they would always be overweight people with stacks of junk food and stuff saying, "I, we don't have any money to eat. We need more welfare. We need more food stamp." So there is a lot of a- abuse of those systems. Mm-hmm. So America has the government telling you where your money goes. Mm-hmm. And, and we see our government send our money to other countries- Yep ... more than our own people. Mm-hmm. We see rebuilding other countries more than some of our own states destroyed by natural disasters- Right or depending what you believe, by our own government sometimes you know? Yeah, yeah. And there's so many issues in America that are not being addressed financially, and then the money's going elsewhere. Mm-hmm. So it's just any institution, you know, any country or place that has an institution in charge of your money, there's gonna be points where we don't agree with it- Right for sure. Mm-hmm. I rather have a daycare system that seems a bit unfair than all these people who are just staying home doing nothing getting paid to eat all my food. Yeah. And- That's true ... they're complaining they don't have food, but they've got cookies and soda galore- ... you know. But yeah, that is something. And- It was, yeah- It was- ... it was just shocking- Yeah ... that I'd never experienced. Um- Yeah. What else? I'm not a huge train fan. Really? Um, I don't mind it, but I mean, I like... We were talking about, I like- Yeah ... my car. I like driving. I like having the freedom of movement and, you know- Right ... driving a fun car. So, it's better now, now that I'm more used to it, but, you know. And in Tokyo you could never have all the cars. I mean, there's a bajillion people there. Right. There's just not space. I mean, you know? Yeah. And everybody's, you know, gonna come and scream about walkable cities and, you know, I get it. I get it, that public transport is way more efficient, and it's more safe, and- Right I agree with all that. I don't doubt that. I'm just saying I miss- I like to drive a car ... having my car. I like my car. Yeah. And I had a great situation when I commuted to work because it was a nice easy drive with, like, four turns, and my work had a nice parking garage with plenty of spots- Mm-hmm ... that I didn't have to pay for, and it was nice. Like- Right ... so. And it's on your own timetable. Right. Exactly. With, with the trains, it's... I mean, it's not bad. They're pretty frequent. Right. But you still have to respond to someone else's timetable. Right. And if there's any... Like, I was once, the other night it was raining, and the train was delayed 45 minutes. Mm-hmm. Where I was just sitting in the station waiting, getting home super late now. It's like 1:30 in the morning. If I was driving, I would've drove in the rain. Right. Exactly. You know? If people wanna pull to the side and say it's raining too heavy, that's their choice. Right. Exactly. I've got... My car has a, a raining mode. There you go. You know, nowadays you got the raining mode. Yeah. You got... Let's go. So I have all-wheel drive- Yeah ... you know, for, for stuff like that. Yeah. And then, um- I mean, it's s- just I'm trying to think of, like, things that are, are personal to me. Like, you know, I don't wanna- Yeah ... hate on Japanese society- Yeah or anything like that because I chose to be here, and, you know, they, they have- Well, and I think that's a good mindset to have because a lot of people complain, and the number one response is, "Well, you didn't have to be here." Right, yeah. "You chose to come here." Yeah, go- Exactly, and that's, that's what I tell the people- Which is interesting because like all the Americans who hate America- Mm-hmm will complain about all of it, and people will say, "Then why don't you go live somewhere else?" Well, no, no, no. Right. You know, it's- Well, and that's, that's what I would tell any foreigner who comes to America and cries about stuff in America. Yeah. You can go back to wherever you came from- Yeah ... if it's so much better there. Right. You know, I don't wanna live in your country. I wanna live in my country- Right ... and do things America way when I live in America. Yeah. So if you don't wanna do them our way, there's the door. But, that's neither here nor there. I apologize. No, no, I totally get it. There's a balance between conformity and complaint and respect. Mm-hmm. Because some things just are backwards- Sure ... in some places. Well, and yeah, and I can not like the way something is done and still respect it and- Yeah ... follow the rules and do it the way it's supposed to be done. Oh, garbage. Garbage is a pain here. Yeah. So, and, and depending on where you live, it can be worse. Like where I am, it's not that bad. But, like- If you're gonna make it where you have to remove the little plastic tab around the drinking bottles- There should be... They should be, like, tearable, or there should be... I, like, I have to take a kn- I don't have nails. I have to... And, and all, all the women here with the acrylic expensive nails, you don't wanna break one. No, you don't. No. And then, so I have to take, like, a knife and remove that part. They should be designed where you can just, like, I don't know, break it away. They, they- Or- ... used to tear. A lot of them now are doing the peel method. I don't know if it's cheaper. Yeah. Well, with the, with the, with the wrapper, that's fine. I'm talking about where the, the cap connects. Mm-hmm. You have to remove that plastic ring. Oh, some, some places, yes. Not where I- I was just told remove it everywhere. Oh. So I always do, and that's an extra- That's a pain ... painful step because it's, like, on there tight. It's on there. I usually take a knife, and I have to, like, cut it open. Yeah. So I'm saying it should be designed differently. But I've seen some places where people are like, "Don't worry about it." Yeah. But when I got here, my friend was like, "Nope, you, here you gotta do that." And I'm like, "Ugh." Yeah, it can be annoying. It's a pain. I was like, I need some kind of machine. I gotta invent some kind of machine- Mm-hmm right, that makes as much environmental damage as throwing the plastic ring away- Right. Yeah ... would. Yeah. So then we're just at a net- Yeah ... net balance. There you go. But yeah, I mean, that's, I mean- So what have you enjoyed then? Yeah, Living in Japan, you've been here back and forth a lot of times. Yeah. You know, it's very safe in Japan for the most part. Oh, yeah. I mean, and I don't just mean, like, there's no crime. There's crime here. There's plenty of crime here. But it's more pedestrian-friendly. Children, you'll see children walking to school, which is nice. Yeah. It's very community oriented. That's nice. There's good things to eat here. That's, that's fun. I like driving here when I drive. I like the car that I have here. That's fun. What do you like about driving here compared to the US? Did it take you a while to get used to- Yes 'cause I couldn't imagine driving here. Yeah, it's, all your instincts are, like, backwards. Yeah. So that's, that's always fun. 'Cause every time I go to cross the road, even as a pedestrian- You look the wrong way ... I'm looking the wrong way. Yeah. I still do. It's enjoyable. I don't necessarily like it more than in the US or anything like that. Oh, okay. It's just, it's enjoyable. The convenience stores are great, the grocery stores. Oh, yeah. The fruit here is out of control. I don't know if you've noticed the produce quality. In what way? Like in a good way? In a good way. Yeah. It's phenomenal. It's phenomenal. It can be more expensive, but, like, you go to Walmart, you get an apple that has zero flavor, right? Like, the, like, you buy a peach here. I bought peaches today. It was, like, 1,300 yen for two peaches, right? So, like $8 or $9 for two peaches. Yeah. But each one is like- Oh, it's good ... you melt in your mouth. Yeah. Right? It's, like, perfection. You're like, "This is-" Is it... And it's white peach season now. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Which I had a white peach milkshake the other day. Yeah. And some pancakes. It was good. And that's another fun thing is the- And they had, like, yellow kiwi a couple months ago ... food. That was really good. Yeah. They have a lot of stuff going on- Yeah ... with that. I really like the convenience stores because in America, like, they don't have as many 24/7 places. Yeah. Especially, like... And when I say there's a lot here, I mean, there's, like, three within five minutes of where we're- Right ... sitting right now. Mm-hmm. And I go out all the time at 1:00 AM, after our evening run or working on international calls, and I just go. And it's crazy. There's no one in there. Right. It's just self-checkout, and they're just like, "We just trust you're not gonna steal anything." That's the biggest thing, and I should have started with that. Japan is still a functioning high-trust society for the most part. Yeah. I mean, you remember hearing stories probably. I think you're a little bit younger than I am, but, you know, my dad when he was a child would go down to the corner store and buy cigarettes and beer for his dad- Yeah, yeah, yeah and walk back. I've heard stuff like this, yeah. Right? Like, that really happened And America used to be for the most part- Mm ... ethnically homogenous and culturally homogenous, you know, up until, there's like that Hart-Celler or something like that might be it. There's like that immigration act that changed basically, right? And they started letting way more people in from way more different places, and no caps, and you know, basically people just started flooding into the United States, right? Right. And America went from a country, for good or ill, I mean, I'm not trying to say that, people who aren't white are bad. I mean, obviously I'm married to an Asian woman, have biracial kids, right? Like, I don't- Mm ... hate anybody. But America was 90-plus percent white throughout the entirety of the country, and 99 to 100% white in many, many areas. Like, you watch Grease, right? Mm-hmm. It's all white people. You watch other old movies that take place- Mm in the American Midwest, it's all white people. It was a high-trust, ethnically culturally homogenous society, and it was safer. It's just- Mm ... I mean, you can't have people with different cultures and values that don't respect the society- Right ... and don't have the same goal and the same morals living together peacefully. I mean, diversity is our strength is a lie. I mean,, it doesn't really work. And Japan is still a great example of a functional high-trust society- Mm For the most part, I mean, there are horror stories of course, but children can walk to the train station and, like, get on the train and ride the train for 15 minutes- Mm-hmm and get off and walk to their school in a different part of the city and- Right ... not get run over by a car, not get abducted, not get beat up and robbed, right? Like- Mm ... you know, if a kid walked down the street alone with a backpack in downtown Detroit- Yeah, I understand what you're saying things might go left, right? And I think you hit a key point there, which is at what point does, unfiltered or unmonitored diversity become, a point where there's no respect? Mm-hmm. When cultures are coming in and merging their cultures and their values are different. Mm-hmm. And I think that's the point we see in America, where it is such a melting pot, but some of the standards are not being respected- Mm Or they're dropping. And the same thing could happen to Japan. Right. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Well, and we saw what happened in, like, the Balkans, and they have the expression Balkanization, and we see a lot of that happening in America, which is very unfortunate, where you have, like, the little communities who are, you know, only focused on their little community for their one little reason, and it's a problem. Right. And, well, and we've seen the destruction of the American culture, where people say- Mm ... America has no culture. It's just a melting pot. Mm-hmm. Therefore, you know, each group do as you please. Mm-hmm. And we have this relative standard. But America did have its own culture- Right ... and it did have its own way that it was running. Mm-hmm. And that has shifted a lot, in some ways for better- Sure ... and in some ways for worse. Right. Right. Yep. And it's unfortunate that, I mean, I am just old enough to, like, remember life pre-9/11, right? Mm-hmm. I was in eighth grade when 9/11 happened and everything started exponentially getting worse in the United States, right? Yeah. And I remember what it was like to fly on an airplane before TSA- Mm ... was around. I remember, like- The way certain things were, the way prices were- Mm-hmm ... and, and to an extent, right? I mean, I remember seeing gas for 89 cents a gallon in, in the United States when I- Wow ... was a young child, right? And it's like, how, how has stuff changed so much? Yeah. And it's just a bummer. There is a benefit to- Yeah ... to having that high trust homogenous society with shared goals and all of that, and Japan embodies that. Yeah. And it's nice. Yeah. And it's sad. It's something I wish we could see in America in a sense that, like, I went for a 10K run the other night at 1:30 in the morning. Mm-hmm. And it was finally cool out, and I was the only person. And my dad was like, "You run around outside at night over there?" I said, "Yeah." Yeah. There was not a single person. Passed maybe- That doesn't bother you ... one cop car one time, and they didn't think I was a loiterer- Yeah ... a hooligan, uh, you know? And that was it. It was some Ubers taking people back from bars. Mm-hmm. Lots of fishermen, and this is a very high fishing region right here in Yokosuka. So no, it was nice. Yeah. It was so peaceful, you know? I don't have a gun on me here, and I don't feel like I need one. Right. I don't feel like I walk around, you know? That's not to say that there aren't stabbings or crimes- Right ... but it is nice. And I don't think I would ever walk around as carefree in Florida or Chicago- Oh, no ... or any of these. Absolutely not. And, and not just those hotspot places for crime, but I don't know, even in Texas. Yeah. Even in, Kansas, you know? Like- I lived in Charlotte, North Carolina, and I- Yeah ... carried my concealed weapon everywhere I went. Yeah. Because you never know. I mean, you stop for gas and some insanity- Yeah ... breaks out. Well, where I was stationed in Virginia, they were robbing people every day, holding them at gunpoint in just the line at the Taco Bell. Bad news VA? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. VA in Newport News. Yeah, bad news. Yeah, bad news. That's funny. Yeah, bad news VA. Newport News, yeah. And so that whole area, it's sad to think, like I could go to a 7-Eleven any time of day here. Right. Yep. The 7-Eleven outside my window in Virginia, they shot a marine 12 times just to take his wallet. They had shot a sailor multiple times. You know, that's such a difference. And that's not to blame all of America's problems on immigration at all. Right. Sure. And there's a lot of issues in America- No, I mean, there- ... for a lot of different reasons ... there's plenty of crime that happens- Yeah ... by people whose families- Yeah, all pieces have been in America off the Mayflower, you know? Like- Yeah. Yep, absolutely. Yeah. It's just sad to see how it's just run amok compared to- Mm-hmm ... Japan has kept some things. And, and Japan has faced criticism for- Mm-hmm ... keeping some things some ways. And that's kinda the turning point we're seeing now. There's a, there's two sides in Japan. Mm-hmm. One that's very pro-immigration, one that's very- Not immigration. And then the middle one that says we should be selective about the immigrants we let in. Mm-hmm. And people say that's racist, that's xenophobic. Who allows you to determine what's a high quality immigrant? But we've seen that, what that process does. Mm-hmm. You know? There are different people, and it's nothing to do with what race they come from, what country they're coming from. Mm-hmm. If you are a person who contributes to society and respects people and you're a good person or not- Yeah ... those are two different people. It doesn't matter whether you're white, Black, Hispanic, Asian, but we've made everything into such a racial matter- Mm-hmm ... and put that as the crucifix for it. And so I think that's the issue. Yeah. Instead of saying, "Hey, immigrants can be anyone." In America's case, it happens to be that a lot of the immigrants are coming from South America or from other countries and are people of color, but that's not to say that if it was white people coming in, we would say, "Oh yeah, everyone's welcome, even the criminals." Right. That's not the case at all. Mm-hmm. No, you're right. Well, and you know, people get confused too. I mean, have you ever heard the expression that there's no magic dirt? I have not, I have not. So people- Unpack that for us ... people, people attribute the success of America to, like, being in America. Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, they, they- Yeah, I've heard that. Yeah, yeah ... they, yeah. So I mean, they think, "If I can just get to America, everything will be better." Right. But you know, that's not how it works. The country is its people, it is its society- Mm ... it is its culture. It is what it says when it says no just as much as it is- Mm when it says yes. You could come to America and fail just as badly- Right. Exactly ... as you did in your home country. Exactly. It's not a... There are more opportunities perhaps- Mm-hmm ... and stuff like that, but it's also how do you use them and take advantage of them. Right. Exactly. 100%. So if you're, if you're a lazy scumbag and- Yeah you know, Alvonia, and you come to the United States of America and continue to be a lazy scumbag, things aren't gonna get- Yeah ... better for you. You're just gonna make America worse. Yeah. We just have one more lazy scumbag, and we don't need that. Who has cases of soda and cookies, but is not paying. Maybe. Maybe. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. So I mean, that's, you get a lot of that. And with Japan, too. I mean, you- Yeah ... you get a lot of magic dirt theory here, and it's not the case. Well, yeah. There's a lot of glamorization of Japan where it says, "Hey, Japan's in the future." And you and I have been sharing an article back and forth about what happened in Kumamoto recently- Oh, yeah, mm-hmm where everyone online is enraged by it, the fact that the managers had a young woman go back into an unsafe building- Yep ... during the earthquake or right afterward- Yep ... to secure the money. Yep. And she lost her life. Yep. And then what they got was, the managers went to the funeral and said, "We're sorry." Yeah. You know? So there are parts of Japan like, hey, that's not in the future at all. No, that's, that's not- That's not in the future at all to me. Yeah. A lot actually having worked with the infrastru- or not the infrastructure so much, but the technology side. The outside of big corporations in the big city, there is a lot of not great. There's a lot of stuff running XP here, man. Mm. Windows XP, and there's a lot of dated infrastructure when it comes- Right ... to technology here, and you know, they're working on it. They're trying to- Yeah ... bring it in, but I mean, there are still things that you have to fax here. Right. So I mean, that's very interesting. Well, they, the issue is people, again, think that central Tokyo is all of Japan. Right. That's really what it comes down to. There are some advanced cities of technology in- Japan. Mm-hmm. That's not all of Japan. Right. A lot of Japan is still ruralized. Mm-hmm. And a lot of those areas are dying out- Yeah 'cause everyone's moving out. Yeah, there's a lot of- People are left there- Urban flight. Yeah. Yep. And it's really bad. I wrote a, college paper on it actually recently, actually just this summer, about the loneliness and suicide and depression and financial poverty rates of elderly Japanese men. Mm-hmm. Of, you know, 70 plus. Some of them are actually committing crimes to be locked up on purpose- Right ... to have food, shelter, and community. Yep. And to me that is not a society of the future. That's a bummer. That's sad. That's a big bummer. It's the future we're heading towards in a lot of places. Yeah. Dr. Anthony Sillards said , that the children in the UK are getting less sunlight exposure than inmates. Wow. You know? And I don't know what article he cited, so, you know, take that with a grain of salt, but I could believe it easily. Okay. I mean- And it's sad ... if you're mandatory outside an hour for yard time every day, that's more than a lot of kids are going outside- Yeah to play. Yeah. 'Cause they just come home and video game it up. Yeah. Well, even here in Japan, every time I go to a train station, everyone's hunched over on their phone. Mm-hmm. PASMO card in one hand, phone in the other. Same with at the train station, on the trains. And in America too, I've seen people driving with TikTok on their- Oh, yeah Dashboard. Oh, yeah. While driving. They have the TV on the dashboard here. You can watch- Yeah ... TV in your car, so. Yeah. That being said, we're rushed for time, 'cause I got a comedy show tonight that we're about to get going to. What would you want your one main important message to be, really? Like I said, don't get me canceled, man. Um, I don't know. I mean, I- I think you already did that for yourself. Dang. Yeah. If you're thinking about coming to Japan, like go for it. Mm. It's fun. Make sure you learn Japanese. It's challenging, but it's rewarding. It's definitely worked out for me. And, yeah, I don't know, man. I don't have some great wisdom to lay down on you or anything, but, - Just a regular guy doing his thing. Yeah, man, just, just keep, keep... Don't, don't you give up, and then the world won't give up on you, I guess. I don't know. Yeah. That was- But no, I like it 'cause I, I, I interview so many professionals and experts with their polished messages that they perform every day. So it's nice to just sit and talk, one guy to another. And also again, doing an in-person interview with some guy I met one time. Right, right. He had, you know, one cheek stuffed with wagyu. He had, you know, champagne in the other hand. Mobile game in the other hand and- Yeah ... a angry wife texting, "Where are you? Are you coming home soon yet?" in the other hand. She, she knew where I was. She wasn't mad. Yeah. But she was actually excited that I got to see the Deftech guy, so. Yeah. Shane. So yeah, it was cool. But again, so great to just have a regular- Yeah ... in-person interview. Thanks for having me. It's something that doesn't happen often, so yeah. Thank you for having me. </p>
